Having a long exhausting working day will consume half of all your energy in a day, not to mention all those meetings that you have to go through in order to coordinate with another department to keep in track your work progress. Meetings can sometimes be really fatiguing, especially if the meeting doesn’t go as you expected or you have to do it with the not so-cooperative colleagues at the office. It will even use up a lot of more energy in you.
In the office, I have witnessed a lot of scene of tempestuous or even dead angry colleagues in meetings. The reasons behind them may be varied, such as the outcome of the coordination didn’t reach the plan, the client’s complain that triggers each others fault blaming, the management’s policy that burden particularly only your department or just like I mentioned earlier, the colleagues that just won’t cooperate with you (these certain people always exist everywhere, but let’s just be positive that they themselves are trying to perform better for the company).
For whatever kind of reason, please ladies avoid doing so in the meeting. Control your anger in the meeting. Don’t let it takes over your charm.
Because sometimes when you can’t control your emotion, words that you produce will be uncontrollable. Not only it will create uncomfortable surrounding for the rest of the meeting or probably will hurt others feelings, but it may also lead you to even stating a sentence that will be the weapon to attack you back. So, be careful with your mouth when anger dominates you.
Thus from my experience, I learned a lot myself and observed a lot as well from my leaders of how to avoid high tension when someone get (somehow) offended during the meeting. Here are some tricks of it:
- Silent, take a deep breath and listen calmly. In the middle of the meeting, when you hear another colleagues making a statement that somehow offends you, or your work’s team, don’t get high too instantly. Instead, keep silent and try to digest more about what the other side is communicating. Make sure that you don’t get it wrongly. If it is what it is. Take a deep breath to lower your emotion and keep listen calmly until the finishing sentence.
- Try to communicate it quietly with your colleagues who is on your team. If it is what it is. Try to communicate about it quietly with your team nearby while still listening to the other side’s perspective. “What nonsense is he talking about?!? Why they never get to understand that there is a standard of procedure of doing it? After all this times!”. You know what I mean in this point right? Try to let out your anger first to someone who is on the same side with you, and discuss it a little.
- Inhale deeply prior starting to speak. After the other side finish their statement and you need to straighten what you are fighting for, get your self together, and take a deep breath before you start speaking and correcting the other side’s misunderstanding. Start smooth and firm.
- Maintain your intonation and avoid using high voice tone. Intonation and voice tone are very important elements to be maintained while you speak. Often, when someone is lost with their words, and if the circumstances is not benefiting her, the intonation and the voice tone will starting to rush themselves. Therefore bear in mind to speak slowly and always maintain your intonation and voice tone.
- Give space between phrase and inhale again. To support one point before, you can try to give space between phrase that in you sentences. Inhale whenever you feel your heart rushing and want to explode in anger. Don’t let it out. Just take it easy and continue your words casually.
- Throw jokes if necessary (even though no one’s laughing). This is a very hard skill to master. Throw jokes when you are in anger is seriously a very difficult thing to do. I myself have never succeeded in doing so, but a lot of leaders in my office have performed this and I am just very impressed with them. This skill is developed by experience I guess. If we can learn and get used to it, we will master it someday.
- Close your statement strong without doubt. Don’t forget to smile. When you are about to finish your statement, try to conclude one more time your comprehensive explanation focusing on matter which had been troubled earlier by the other side within one sentence. Don’t forget to keep talking casually and give smile in the end if you feel like to do it.
Nope, I am not saying that all of mentioned points above are easy to do. But it is important for us to learn it. Because trust me, it is no one’s disadvantages that is at stake but ours if we let ourselves sink in anger (of course especially during the meeting).
So, do you have your own methods to control your emotion during the meeting?